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Life is shortsmile while you still have teeth. Explore our collection of motivational and famous quotes by authors you know and love. I tried but they wanted cash.

Here are 170 of the best funny quotes I could find. No matter how bad it gets Im always rich when I go to the dollar store. Have you ever made a toy squeak its last squeak it changes you man 3.

So far so good. To make you relax laugh and have a good time. Short people with an umbrella.

Cindy from Marzahn 249. Wouldnt exercise be more fun if calories screamed while you burned them. Photo credits Pinterest Funny Quotes Of The Day 1.

10 Monday 23 Tuesday 40 Wednesday 22 Thursday and 5 Friday Anonymous 24. If you were my wife Id drink it Winston Churchill funny quote. By working faithfully eight hours a day you may eventually get to be boss and work twelve hours a day Robert Frost Love is an irresistible desire to be irresistibly desired.

Our collection of short funny quotes which are short straight to your head and mind-blowing. I have Alzheimers bulimia first I eat everything in sight and then I forget to puke. Today I will be as useless as the letter g in lasagna.

Read our short quotes quickly because theyre short. Tomorrow is often the busiest day of the week. I always give 100 at Work.

One day youtube twitter and facebok will join together and be called Youtwitface 2. The first 5 days after the weekend are the hardest. Therefore here you have short funny quotes about life so you can expand your life.

I intend to live forever. My dream job would be the karma delivery service 26. Winston if you were my husband Id put poison in your coffee.

The hilarious moment always memorable in life. Age Matter Something A day without sunshine is like you know night. Funny Quotes Of The Day 1.

Bill Murray 251. Gary Delaney 248. If life gives you lemons make lemonade.

Short funny quotes and sayings I believe we should all pay our tax bill with a smile. 40 Funny Quotes Of The Day And Short Funny Sayings Im not clumsy The floor just hates me the table and chairs are bullies and the walls get in my way. When tempted to fight fire with fire remember that the Fire Department usually uses water.

But here is not that type you can laugh and what you are. Best Funniest quotes and sayings. Join the fun with our Funny Quote of the Day on the web Facebook and blogs.

Easy to read the list of the most hilarious phrases ever spoken. Looking for the most funny quotes today. Getting paid to sleep thats my dream job.

Read our short quotes quickly. Its a beautiful day to leave me alone. Discover and share Funny Quotes Of The Day.

15 Short Funny Quotes. Steven Wright Click to tweet. Perfect for sharing your best friends and family.

When I was a kid my parents moved a lot but I always found them. Sometimes i wish i was an octopus so i could slap eight people at once. Im best served with coffee and a.

60 Short Funny Motivational Quotes 1. Youll discover the funniest lines ever on friends family love women men fun with great images.

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