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Real girls are never perfect and perfect girls are never real. Famous funny quotes and humorous quotes Life is a waste of time time is a waste of life so get wasted and the time of your life. Easy to read short quotations by famous authors and anonymous.

Doctors are just the same as lawyers. If you die in an elevator be sure to push the UP button. If girls always treated each other like we do when were drunk in the girls bathroom then the world would be a much happier place.

60 Short Funny Motivational Quotes. Death Adobe updates and taxes. Easy to read a list of the most hilarious phrases ever spoken.

The only difference is that lawyers merely rob you whereas doctors rob you and kill you too. Cool Funny Quotes Amusing Sayings and Quotations. When you sit on a hot stove for two minutes it seems like two hours.

When you sit with a nice girl for two hours it seems like two minutes. A proverb is a short sentence based on long experience. I choose a lazy person to do a hard job because a lazy person will find an easy way to do it Bill Gates.

Short funny quotes. Read our short quotes quickly because theyre short. 100 Funny Work Quotes.

Like a road it has many bends ups and down. Here we have collected short funny quotes and sayings which can help you be happier and help you feel better. First in line is a compilation of inspirational and funny quotes from movies.

In life only three things are certain. Perfect for sharing blogging and tweeting. Do not let a flattering woman coax and wheedle you and deceive you.

If someone points at your black clothes and asks whose funeral it is you just look around the room and answer havent decided. Our collection of short funny quotes which are short straight to your head and mind-blowing. Sometimes short funny quotes can help up loosen up a bit.

When tempted to fight fire with fire remember that the Fire Department usually uses water. To me drink responsibly means dont spill it. They just lose their appeal.

More Funny Short Sayings Old lawyers never die. The trouble is they are usually married to each other. If you are a fan of Spider Man you may be familiar with these quotes.

You live learn and upgrade. She is after your barn. These funny quotes and sayings may have been coined by someone else but their funny motivational quotes and witty words will make everyone laugh.

Life is full of disappointments and I just added you to the list. Age is of no importance unless youre a cheese. Short Jokes Anyone Can Remember Clever Jokes That.

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